Christmas

I've been feeling exceptionally detached lately. Buried myself with work and not really think of any of my own aspirations and goals. The last few nights I have escaped to books. Reading until dawn. I'm slipping back into that uncaring. I feel like I can't be trusted to be by myself. I would think of something stupid. If I don't think about myself.

I have Underworld on full blast in my room. I can't do that at my regular dwelling. I usually indulge myself this way driving exceptionally fast late at night. I haven't had the chance nor the excuse to do so in a very long time. I love driving at night, music blaring, just have the music wash over me. I feel dangerous then. Like I've unleashed myself. The cold night air running through my unkempt hair. I had felt driven then. I had goals and aspirations. I don't feel it now. Maybe I have become bored with myself.

I need goals again. I need to put myself in the position to feel accomplished again. New year resolutions? No not really. Just things I need to get done.